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The following animals defy the laws of nature in the dick department. It just comes with the territory. But I also hate to break it to you, but your penis pales in comparison to that of a pig, or even a green sea turtle for that matter.

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When new emojis were announced last weekalongside a number of excellent steps in representation for people with disabilities and queer and interracial couples, one was the obvious pick for Instantly Iconic. And the filthy hive mind that is the internet immediately went to the most childish interpretation possible. Many of the people celebrating the advent of the Teeny Things Possibly Including Penises Depending On Context emoji were rejoicing at the prospect of having a one-tap response to unsolicited dick picsand the related prospect of men who send them suddenly thinking twice beforehand.

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If you are unfamiliar with this request, you have not witnessed the undying oddity that is G. And that is unusual. It would have only been a matter of time.

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Procreating is serious business in the animal kingdom, and Mother Nature has gone out of her way to cleverly ensure the survival of her many, many denizens. From sex organs with multiple heads to prodigious shafts exceeding an animal's own body length, here are 12 of the weirdest and often scariest animal penises on the planet:. But what makes this soft-bodied marine mollusk particularly different is its ability to grow a new penis within 24 hours.

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The past two years have been dizzying and highly unpleasant, like a Gravitron at the Ku Klux Klan's semi-annual block party. This is largely because our president, a hunk of boiled hot dog, seems to operate completely at random, without any sort of overarching logic or memory of what he's just done. But what if there was something, some sort of keystone idea or principle, that explained the last two years of domestic politics?

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H umans have been looking for ways to help them get off since the dawn of civilization. Side note: Treat this as an adult holiday buying guide for that extra touch of festivity. Cock rings have been around since B.

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Twitter is now best described as an angry mob. This is harassment. Policy differences should not drive anybody to this kind of behavior.

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The term penis applies to many intromittent organsbut not to all; for example the intromittent organ of most cephalopoda is the hectocotylusa specialised arm, and male spiders use their pedipalps. Even within the Vertebrata there are morphological variants with specific terminology, such as hemipenes. In most species of animals in which there is an organ that might reasonably be described as a penis, it has no major function other than intromission, or at least conveying the sperm to the female, but in the placental mammals the penis bears the distal part of the urethrawhich discharges both urine during urination and semen during copulation. Most male birds e.

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